Teenage Rising

So it’s been awhile since my last entry. i don’t know why but tonight i’ve got all these emotions piled up inside of me. there’s somebody i miss. it’s funny cause i try to find 101 reasons to hate her and i already have but for some reason i still feel empty when i think about her. i wonder if she’s doing okay. wonder if she’s fine. wonder if she misses those days. those days when i thought she’d be mine. i wonder if she thinks about me. wonder if she left me behind. i miss her. i do. but then again when i think about all the bad times she put me through. i begin to wonder if it’s the idea of the girl i thought she was that i miss. if i could go back in time and fix everything i wouldn’t. because if she wanted things to get better then she would’ve fought with me to make things better, not against me. she would’ve sacrificed her pride like i did for her. she would’ve believed in me like i did in her. she would’ve picked me up when i was down like i picked her up all those time when she needed me. then why? why cant i just forget about it? why cant i make it like nothing happened? nothing did, so why am i so caught up in this? i just want to let go. i want to be free. she stole something. a piece of me. she has to return it. at least let me know. that she felt for me the same thing i felt for her. and that it was just as hard for her to have let me go

Issues with letting go. I have that. When did attaching yourself to somebody get so painful. So bloody vulnerable. It’s pathetic.

R.I.P Mr.Liao

I lost a great teacher today. He was more than that, he was a good friend. Rest In Peace Mr.Liao. You will always be remembered.